How to get to heaven in Ireland

Note: Contributed by Ms. Conroy, herself. Yes, she's feeling better.

I was testing children in my Dublin Sunday school class to see if they understood the concept of getting to heaven.

I asked them, 'If I sold my house and my car, had a big jumble sale and gave all my money to the church, would that get me into heaven?'

'NO!' the children answered.

'If I cleaned the church every day, mowed the garden, and kept everything tidy, would that get me into heaven?'

Again, the answer was 'NO!'

By now I was starting to smile.

'Well, then, if I was kind to animals and gave sweeties to all the children, and loved my husband, would that get me into heaven?'

Again, they all answered 'NO!'.

I was just bursting with pride for them.

I continued, 'Then how can I get into heaven?'

A six year-old boy shouted out:

'YUV GOTTAE BE FOCKN' DEAD..........