Because this:
(Please note how nicely everything is organized.)
In Eleven Easy Steps, is supposed to look like this:
Thus far, after several hours in the hot sun, everything looks like this:
I just noticed the first sentence in the instruction manual:
Methinks it's time to have a proper G&T and wait for Ms. Conroy to return."To assemble the swing, you need two people."
If nothing else, this will be a memorable Memorial Day Weekend.
And to think, people died for me to have this freedom.
Why yes, I do believe I'll have another G&T.
Elizabeth, I'd say this post is blogging. Oh yes! I can relate. We have our two people when we assemble, all too often two people yelling at each other about what the other has done wrong. My thought: Best done with a person you don't know very well when restraint is the order of the day. "You always hurt the one you love...."
ReplyDeleteMimi - Whining, more accurately. I think G&T will help save this marriage. Besides, all my neighbors are being very sensible and are all out on their boats.
ReplyDeleteWhining is blogging. That's my story, and I'm sticking to it.
ReplyDeleteI suppose next time GP and I could have an assembly party with G&T. Of course, with one too many G&Ts, there's the risk of the assembly going badly wrong. ;-)
Oh, dear, Mimi. And here I thought I was sharing profound thoughts. Hubris. It's not just for men.
ReplyDeleteI don't know about you, but a few proper G&Ts or stiff glasses of bourbon at appropriate moments have held my marriage together for 37 years. It hasn't helped to assemble bicycles, bookcases, grilles and other things we've put together over the years - don't even get me started about stuff from IKEA - but, well, first things first, I always say.
Hope you have a wonderful Memorial Day weekend.
Have a
You and Ms Conroy have a good weekend.
ReplyDeleteSorry we kept your other pair of hands so long today.... but, I think Ms C will find great relief in putting together your swing after the data dump that Julian and I did to her this morning.
ReplyDeleteI confess, when I saw the blog post title, and the first images at the top, I thought: "It's some kind of Blog Blackout for Reproductive Rights. Elizabeth is showing us the (harmful) tools of illegal abortions."
ReplyDeleteOoops, no.
Good luck w/ your swing!
BJ - You didn't do more data dump than she's used to at work. She has a remarkable mind and a photographic memory. Y'all chose well.
ReplyDeleteJCF - Thanks. Ms. Conroy was too pooped to work on it when she got home. Tomorrow's another day.
ReplyDeleteConsole yourself...
ReplyDeleteImagine how good the first G and T after the construction is completed will be...
It was delicious but we're not done yet. We'll finish it this afternoon, after the sun goes down. Stay tuned.
ReplyDeleteChuckle. Memories. MANY years ago when our children were young we were living abroad. One Christmas we had gotten them something that needed to be assembled, and it was complicated. Christmas Eve finally got them to bed and asleep to start on this project and discovered that all the instructions were in Arabic. . . A language which I could barely speak and read not at all. Hubby (who happens to be an engineer) cheerily told me that when you don’t pay any attention to the instructions it doesn’t matter what language they are written in. It was a long night. We had to be quiet enough not to wake sleeping children in the next room. Countries where they instructions are written in Arabic tend not to have alcohol easily available. Bourbon would have helped.
ReplyDeleteThis is sooooo true you'd think the Spirit Herself wrote out these instructions and then made sure no one was left alone to follow. I love it. My partner and I once put together a table for our office. We laid out all the direction sheets and followed up to a point, then fell into such hysterical laughter we threw away the directions and guessed that peg A must insert into hole B on panel C. It just seemed right. We followed our natural IQ and our relationship humor till we got it right. Isn't that the way of faith—you don't get it "right" till you follow in the company of others? And even then you may need G&T at every watering hole on the way. Grin.
ReplyDeleteKaren - I have bad, bad memories of putting bikes together past midnight on Christmas eve. Oh, God. I thought I had forgotten. It all comes back to me now and the swing doesn't look so bad.
ReplyDeleteLyn - It's all over now. Just one bolt missing. We'll get it replaced tomorrow. But, it's DONE. YAY! Pictures in the morning.
ReplyDelete