Neither rain, nor sleet, nor hail . . .

. . . nor even a snow storm will stop our family celebration of Little Christmas. In fact, it just prolonged it.

Our Massachusetts contingent were prevented from joining us, so we're just going there in two weeks.

Mackie and Abby got Butterscotch, the talking horse.

Don't ask . . .I have no idea. I just do what Nanas are supposed to do.

Abby also got a "Little People" Castle. Her father was thoroughly disgusted because when he was growing up, "Weebles" were ever so much better. He's right, actually. I suspect in 25 years, Weebles will be a collector's item.

I had the distinct feeling, in the moment he saw the "The Little People" that he was starting to feel old. It was a wickedly sweet moment.

Our girls LOVE to play games. Abby and our pup Lenny are getting ready to play a coloring game on Mia's iPhone. There was an amazing quiet for, oh, ten full minutes. And then Ms. CoCo got jealous and Mr. Lenny got even more needy and Ms. Abby got bored. You know. Like all families.

Mackie and Julie played a wicked game of "Travel Checkers." Mackie is a very good player, beating Julie 3 out of 5 games - and I should mention that Julie is the absolute Queen of Board Games.

Looks like she has a little competition for her crown.

The reverse side of the board is Tic Tac Toe, and I went head to head with Mackie in fierce competition, but it seems there's a few things her Nana can teach her grand daughter about strategy.

The children got together and bought us a new swing for Llangollen. Our son-in-law has even promised to come and put it together for us before the beginning of summer. We were more than pleased with our present.

We feasted on Chicken Piccata, red potatoes and broccoli (Ms. Conroy thought the red and green would look more like Christmas), and had a killer chocolate cake for dessert.

I'm pretty exhausted this morning - a bit like my car battery which was pretty low on juice this morning. I'm sitting here waiting for Triple A to come and give me a jump start. I wish someone could come give me a bit of a jump start on my day.

But, you know, the feeling of deep satisfaction of being part of this incredible family is a glow that keeps me warm on this absolutely frigid morning.

Christmas may only come once a year, but families - for good or for ill - are forever. So, why not make the best of them, if you can?

In the end, they are the best Christmas present ever - all year round - even in the midst of a frigid cold Monday morning after a snow storm.

The Inaugurational Invocation (for the rest of us)

Note: Several of us on the Progressive side of the aisle got this note from Bishop Gene earlier this morning:

I am writing to tell you that President-Elect Obama and the Inaugural Committee have invited me to give the invocation at the opening event of the Inaugural Week activities, “We are One,” to be held at the Lincoln Memorial, Sunday, January 18, at 2:00 pm.

It will be an enormous honor to offer prayers for the country and the new president, standing on the holy ground where the “I have a dream speech” was delivered by Dr. King, surrounded by the inspiring and reconciling words of Abraham Lincoln’s Gettysburg Address.

It is also an indication of the new president’s commitment to being the President of ALL the people. I am humbled and overjoyed at this invitation, and it will be my great honor to be there representing the Episcopal Church, the people of New Hampshire, and all of us in the gay, lesbian, bisexual and transgender community.

For links to other articles, check out Episcopal Cafe

Transformation and Destiny

“You are my son, the Beloved;
with you I am well pleased.” Mark 1:4-11
I Epiphany - January 11, 2009
The Episcopal Church of St. Paul, Chatham
(the Rev’d Dr.) Elizabeth Kaeton, rector and pastor

I’ve been writing this sermon since our Monday staff meeting. One of our staff mused out loud that this was the story about ‘The Transformation of Jesus.”

Not ‘The Transfiguration of Jesus” – where Jesus becomes radiant and speaks with Moses and Elijah on Mount Tabor (Matthew 17:1-9). No, ‘The Transformation of Jesus.” The thinking was that through baptism by John in the Jordan River, Jesus was transformed to do the ministry he was called by God to do.

I’ve been musing about that distinction ever since – about transformation and the role of destiny. Yes, I said destiny. Blame it, in part, on my heritage. The Portuguese think quite a lot about ‘destiny’. We have even perfected a genre of folk music known as ‘fado’ – meaning destiny or fate. I like to think of it as ‘Depression Music of The Portuguese.'

Blame it also, at least in part, on some of the movies I have been watching this holiday season. If you have not seen ‘Slumdog Millionaire’ well, don’t miss it. It’s not the best story ever written – well, actually, it’s several stories.

It’s a love story, a story about the power of good and the forces of evil, a story about two brothers, a story about the cruelty of poverty in India, and yes, it’s a story about destiny. The thing of it is, it is a story very, very well told. Compelling. Powerful. Authentic. As brutally honest as the country in which it is filmed.

The context is the Indian version of a popular game show, “So you want to be a millionaire.” The contestant is Jamal Malik, a kid who grew up as the poorest of the poor in the slums of India, poorer that a dog – hence the name, ‘slumdog’.

By some fairly unusual twits and turns in his young life, Jamal finds himself a contestant on that game show. He is one question away from winning 20 million rupees. How does he do it?

A. He’s a genius.

B. He’s cheating.

C. He’s lucky.

D. It is written.

Unlike most of real life, in this game show, there is only one correct answer. And, I suppose, therein lies the difference. In real life, the answer, more often, is: ‘all of the above.’

I think, however, that each of these four components are an important part of the human enterprise. Indeed, I think these four impact on our spirituality and relationship with God.

So, what of genius? I think we all have our own particular genius in a variety of areas. Some of us are ‘genius’ by the usual definition of that word – a person who is gifted with intelligence or skill in one or several areas. It doesn’t necessarily have anything to do with education. It can also mean someone with strong individuality, imagination, creativity, and innovative drive.

One of my favorite geniuses was Ms. Maybelle Bird, a then 80-something year old woman who lived in Newark when I worked there, who once said to me, “Faith is coming to the ledge and knowing that, if you jump, two things will happen – you will either find you have something solid to stand on, or you will be taught to fly.” Her faith, her wisdom, was her genius.

The second possible answer is ‘cheating.’ We all ‘cheat’ in life in some way, don’t we? Yes, of course: cheating is usually meant to describe an illegal or immoral activity; but sometimes we ‘cheat’ because the playing field was uneven to begin with. We use our intelligence, our imagination, our wit and creativity to see a way around an obstacle or a barrier – to level the playing field – and find another way to achieve our goal.

There’s a commercial I saw the other day which depicts a little boy whose father wants him to be the best baseball player in the world. After several frustrating swings and misses, he stands up, smiles broadly and exclaims, “I’m going to be the best pitcher in the world!” See also: genius.

My father always liked to repeat the aphorism that ‘genius is 10% brain, 90% strain.” I suspect that somewhere in that strain are at least a few percentage points of ‘beating the odds’, which some also refer to in the more dramatic terms of ‘cheating life’ – or ‘defying fate’.

The third possibility is luck. Well, yes. There’s that. But, what is luck? Is it merely coincidence or is does it have to do with a combination of things like, say, circumstance – being in the right place at the right time? Being born in America instead of India? Well, then again, that might be certain parts of America or to a certain class of people in India. Or, is luck a series of choices you make and suddenly, you’re behind ‘Door Number One’ and you got the two week vacation in Hawai’i and not Bozo the Clown waving a ‘Loser’ flag.

The folks in 12 Step Programs like to say that “Coincidence is the name God uses when God wants to remain anonymous.” Serendipity is another. Luck, I think, is yet another. And, I suspect, they are all alias of God as the Holy Spirit.

Finally, there’s destiny. “It is written.” Many people – some are even good Christian folk – can be heard talking about “God’s will” as if one’s role in life were to find The Big Filing Cabinet in the Sky and search until you find the file with your name on it and follow exactly what it is God wants for you.

So do you believe that? Do you believe that "God has a plan for your life?" and your job is to figure it out "God's will for you"? Really? Then, what do you make of the gift of 'free will'? How do you factor in 'freedom to choose'?

Well, I do believe that there is an 'Intelligent Design' in Life, but I don't know that it is personalized for individual lives. I do believe God wants us to live the life given to us, not waste it searching for the correct formula or proper recipe - yes, even if we make mistakes. In fact, especially when we make mistakes.

A great theologian of the early church once wrote that "the Glory of God is (hu)man(kind) fully human." I couldn't agree more.

I suspect when we get to heaven, we’ll find the words, “Just Do It!” written somewhere around the entrance to the heavenly gate.

Then again, I think it is often ‘written’ but sometimes not followed, and sometimes it is ‘written’ after it is followed. As my friend, Ed Bacon once said, “I sure am glad Mary said ‘yes’ to the Incarnation of God before the theologians had a chance to write the doctrine.”

I guess it’s like that old question, “Do the times make the person or does the person make the times?” Are we born to fulfill our destiny, or do we create our own destiny – as well as that of others? Is destiny necessarily destination?

I don’t know if Jesus was transformed by his baptism at the Jordan but then again, I don’t believe Jesus was just any ordinary man. Because I believe in the Incarnation, I believe that Jesus was fulfilling what we would call vocation – his calling from God – which, I believe we all have. We are all called through our baptism in Him, to be faithful to our vocation – to re-present Him and His Teachings in and to the world in our own unique way.

In that sense, I suppose that Baptism is our ‘destiny’ as Christians which we re-affirm at Confirmation – to become more Christ-like. And, I suppose, when we say ‘yes’ to that destiny, in that moment, we are transformed by grace to do that which God has called us to do.

Somewhere between “In the beginning . . .” and “It is written . . .” we live our lives of faith. The experiences we have, the choices we make in life, form the pathway to our own salvation. If we pay attention to our lives, we may find the answers that hold the key to the questions of our past, which may also help to unlock the questions in our future.

That, in fact, is a big part of the role of religion – to help you pay attention to your life, to the questions your life asks and the answers you have given so that you might better answer them. And, in the process of discovering or un-covering or re-covering the answers – or, perhaps, changing or re-framing the questions – you may remain true and faithful to the idea of you, the dream of you, the essential spark of you, that God had of you when you were called into being.

That’s the path which your baptism sets you on. That process can be transformational, if you choose to take it while loving mercy, doing justice and walking humbly with God. But it is your path, your process, and no one else can walk it for you. No one can become the ‘you’ God created you to be.

That’s not so much about genius or luck or cheating or something called your ‘destiny’ as it is your own unique identity. It’s not about getting the right answer, A, B, C or D. It’s not even so much about the answer as it is being faithful to living out the question.

It’s about being in those moments and choosing, like Jesus or the Slumdog Jamal – who said ‘yes’ to love, to hope, to possibility, to goodness – to seize the opportunity, when you don’t know the answer much less really understand the question, and say ‘Yes’ to something greater –and better – than yourself.

It is in those moments, I believe, if we listen carefully, we will hear God says to us, “You are my child, my Beloved; with you I am well pleased."

Amen.

A Merry Little Complication

Years ago we started a wonderful little family tradition.

As our kids got older, got married, and started having families of their own - complete with inlaws - we said, hey, you know what? We want you to start your own Christmas Day traditions. Be with your own families. Celebrate the day with your inlaws, if that will keep peace in the family.

You are most welcome to come here on Christmas day, but here's the deal: Our family gathers on Little Christmas (the Sunday on or before or after The Feast of the Epiphany), and celebrates with a Big Meal and an exchange of gifts.

It has worked very, very well. No strain, lower tension, AND, we get to take advantage of all the after Christmas sales. Such a deal, right!

Our family was to start gathering tonight in anticipation of Little Christmas tomorrow. Except . . . .

There's a Very Big Snowstorm predicted to begin at noon. The National Weather Service is calling for 7-10 inches for our area, and then head up to New England, where our son and his wife and their three kids live.

Ms. Conroy was glued to The Weather Channel, and we were text messaging furiously to each other last night. The final word was: Let's wait and see what happens on Saturday afternoon. The New England contingent was even willing to get up at the crack of dawn on Sunday morning and make their way here.

So, we wait and prepare and try not to let our anxiety intrude on or invade our excitement.

The presents? Well, they can be given at any time. Mostly, we just want to be with each other, is all. To catch up and laugh and retell stories we've already shared by email but this time, we'll do it in person, and that will make all the difference.

See, in the end, it's really all about the Incarnation. It's not so much about 'the presents' as it is about 'being present' to each other and with each other.

We'll all be very sad if the snow keeps us from our Little Christmas celebration, but should that happen, we'll all be deeply committed to finding another way - to get to celebrate the gift of our family 'by another route' and at another time.

So, Mother Nature is going to do whatever She will. We'll not be wasting God's time with prayers about changing the weather. S/he's got people starving in India and a war in The Gaza Strip and Iran and Afghanistan to worry about.

Meanwhile, I'm going to start baking and cooking.

Haven't you heard?

It's almost Little Christmas!

"I'm sittin' in a railway station, got a ticket for my destination . . mmm"

I have always loved to travel by train. I much prefer it to any other mode of transportation. While I love driving my little VW Convertible Bug, a train ride is far more relaxing - and productive.

I can read the newspaper or my favorite book, work on my lap top, get up and walk to the Cafe Car to get a snack, and, occasionally, engage in some relaxed, interesting conversations with fellow travelers.

Oh, and eavesdrop on the conversations of others without a shred of guilt.

I took the train to NYC yesterday - a 45 minute ride on the Midtown Direct - which gave me the luxury of lingering over the New York Times and the New Jersey Star Ledger - something I rarely get to do because I pretty much scan stories online.

There's something about holding a newspaper in your own two hands that is deeply satisfying. Well, I suppose that is true for those "of a certain age".

I love the feel and the smell of the ink on newsprint, and although it doesn't happen much any more, I don't even mind getting some of the black stuff on my hands. I also love the juxtaposition of stories on the page - the way some stories seem, unintentionally, to be a comment on others.

Besides, there are some stories that appear in print that you simply cannot find online, and vice verse.

Yesterday's Star Ledger had an interesting article on the front page: "For time-challenged, spirituality comes in small bites" by Duke Helfand. I can't seem to find it online. (See what I mean?).

The article begins: "So you're racing through another jampacked day, late picking up the kids from basketball practice because you got stuck at the office. Then you pay the bills, walk the dog and perhaps grab cold pizza before collapsing into bed. When do you ever find time for God?"

Mr. Hefland continues to catalogue some new publications that address that question: "The One Minute Bible, Day by Day." "5 Minute Theologian: Maximum Truth in Minimum Time." "Aunt Susie's 10-Minute Bible Dinners: Bringing God into Your Life One Dish at a Time."

There's "7 Minutes with God," which promises, "Learn how to plan a daily quiet time that takes you just seven minutes."

And, what about your over-programmed 10 year old? What about "The Kid Who Would Be King: One Minute Bible Stories about Kids"?

Mr. Hefland had me when he quoted Presiding Bishop Katharine Jefferts Schori, "What's the scarcest commodity in American life?" she asks, "How do we invite people to connect their life of faith with their life at the soccer practice or in the coffee shop or at the pub or waiting in line for something? I think that's the biggest challenge the church is beginning to recognize."

Preach it, sistah! My answer: Well, one small step is to take the train more often. It's a place where you can not only help lower the level of pollution and keep the planet green, you can also defy the laws of physics: you slow down your brain without slowing down your body.

The story continued on page 5, amid continued stories about the Senate flap over Roland Burris, an ad inviting you to 'help fight children's cancer' by donating your car, another to move your business into a 'First Class Address" in Newark, and a "Giant HDTV sale at P.C. Richards and Son." ($1,000 off and up to 18 months No Interest on HDTVs)

It was the picture on page 4, just across from the Religion/Spirituality story that caught my eye. Pictured was a little boy with his father.

He's just a little guy and he has his shirt off. His father is holding his head and the boy is holding something over his shoulder that looks like a chain with something that looks like a small air plane propeller attached.

He is surrounded by other children and a few adults. The children look morbidly fascinated. Some look horrified. One of the male adults is looking away. A woman is clutching her heart.

You have to read the caption to get the story: "A Pakistani Shi'a Muslim teaches his son how to flagellate himself with knife blades on chains during a Muharram procession in Lahore, Pakistan, yesterday. Muharram, the first month of the Islamic calendar, is observed around the world with 10 days of mourning in remembrance of the martyrdom of Imam Hussein, the grandson of the prophet Muhammad."

Well, there it is, then. I suppose there's an argument to be made for having too much time on one's hands.

I put down my paper for a moment to consider the juxtaposition of the two stories when I was distracted by a few conversations around me, which I had been completely oblivious to previously.

I couldn't see any faces, but the voice was that of a young woman - oh, late 20s, early 30s.

"And so I said to him, I said, 'No way'," she said,

"And so now, . . . literally? . . .," she continued, "I have to run into The City for this interview and then . . .seriously? . . . I have to be on a plane . . . TONIGHT at 6 PM . . .for Albany."

"Swear. To. God." she said to him she said.

Then, she gasped dramatically, "Isn't that INSANE?"

The young gentleman with her made a sort of a grunting noise that I suppose was meant to signal his agreement. Then I heard him say, "It's CRAAAAZZZYYY!"

A few seats up and to my right, another conversation - same situation, young woman, young man - and she was saying, "Seriously? I am sooooo psyched for you! That's AMAZING!" she said.

The young man apparently agreed, "Right. I mean . . .literally? . . .it's just INSANE!" he said.

"CRAAAZZZZY" she agreed, enthusiastically.

Their . . . erm . . ."conversations" . . . continued like this for 45 minutes, wafting in and out of my reading and reflections on the newspaper articles.

They were clearly communicating to each other, but they seemed to be - almost literally - singing a different verse of the same sing-song story.

There was clearly the excitement and enthusiasm that often marks the ebullience of youthful conversations. I love the way they take the sound of words that are meant to be fact (Seriously. Literally.) and turn them into questions.

And, I suppose when you live in a world where you can be in NYC by train in the morning and Albany by plane that evening, the only descriptive word for most of the things in your life is "INSANE!"

Even God gets portioned up in 7 minute daily sound bites - 1 minute if you're a kid - so you can fit time in for The Divine as you multitask your way through the day.

I'm still ruminating on the question asked by Bishop Katharine Jefferts Schori, "What's the scarcest commodity in American life?" she asks, "How do we invite people to connect their life of faith with their life at the soccer practice or in the coffee shop or at the pub or waiting in line for something? I think that's the biggest challenge the church is beginning to recognize."

Or, to put it in the title of the book, how can we find "maximum truth in minimum time"?

Me? I love trains, where I can sit and listen and think about how small the world has become, and yet sometimes, when you travel to another country, you not only have to cross geography, you have to travel back - or forward - in time.

In some cases, like the picture of the young boy in Pakistan, we're not just talking "time zones". We're talking centuries!

The 'church catholic' has got quite a challenge on Her hands - perhaps more so than at any other time in "Her/story". The 'global village' has become so small, and yet we are still so far apart on so many levels.

Please don't misunderstand me - just a 20+ hour plane ride, give or take a few time zones, and that same father would be charged with child abuse in this country.

But, I'm thinking that maybe, just maybe, if our faith were more embodied - more sensual, at least - perhaps it wouldn't be so hard to connect what we say we believe with what is happening in the rest of our lives.

You know, if you could hold and touch and feel and smell your faith the way I prefer doing that with the newspaper vs. reading the same story in cyberspace.

I mean, what if we MOVED more during our time of worship? What if we actually moved our bodies toward the altar during the offertory, instead of just our money and other offerings?

I remember reading somewhere that at St. Gregory of Nissa in San Fransisco, there is an option to pray the Lord's Prayer with your body as well as your mouth. Apparently, this was done in the early church.

I'm not a big fan of Liturgical Dance, but you know, when it's done well it can be the difference between saying the psalms and chanting the psalms.

I don't know. I'm just thinking that if we were more embodied in our lives - especially our lives of worship - we might actually understand more about the incarnation. Not as a doctrine, but as the Risen Lord who lives in us.

Then again, seriously? Literally? I just might be INSANE!

Just a Paycheck Away

A few months ago, I was contacted by Forward Day By Day, an Episcopal Publishing Company, to do a series of 'wee-bookies'(sometimes known as 'tract pamphlets') on hope.

The first arrived in my mail yesterday and I must say, it was apretty heady experience for such a small booklet.

Forward Movement Publications is an official agency of the national Episcopal Church. They produce pamphlets, booklets, and books of interest to Episcopalians, often about the 'nuts and bolts' of our faith. You can find a fascinating history of their founding here.

They are probably best known for the popular quarterly devotional "Forward Day by Day", providing daily meditations based on readings from the Bible appointed by the lectionaries.

Their website is: http://www.forwardmovement.org/

You can find my little contribution http://www.forwardmovement.org/showbook.cfm?prodid=2016

Just a Paycheck Away
by E. M. Kaeton


As our economy continues its bumpy road to recession, E. M. Kaeton offers a much-needed glimpse of hope. In this story of a man making the most out of what little he has, we see what is clearest in times in crisis: that a little bit of hope goes a long way.

"We're all just two or three paychecks away from living with the anxiety that steals any moment of joy you may find in the midst of your search for "normal," or "stable," or, well, just not being in desperate need any more....We are all just two or three paychecks away from losing it all, and the church stands guard there, at the brink of isolation and fear, offering relationships and hope."

Price: $0.60
Item No 2016
12 pages

David Letterman: The Top 10 Things We'll Miss About Shrub

My personal favorite is #2.

The really sad part is that these were some of his best moments.

America in shock.

I know we're all looking forward to the inauguration. We're even more anxious to finally be able to usher in "The End of an Error."

The Daily Brief in today's Huffington Post includes this article by Nathan Gardels. It's pretty sobering.

You can read it all here.

Here's a little something to whet your appetite:

The year 2008 is thus likely to go down in American history as an even more pivotal one than 2001, when the 9/11 terrorist attacks occurred, because the life of the average American is going to be shaped far more by the consequences. We're not talking about the inconvenience of lining up to go through metal detectors at the airport. We're talking about the transformation of the American model itself. Nobel Prize-winning economist Joseph Stiglitz was not exaggerating when he quipped to me earlier this year that "the fall of Wall Street is to market fundamentalism what the fall of the Berlin Wall was to communism." Just like that, we're in a different era.

In this circumstance, Barack Obama will not be judged by the color of his skin, or even the content of his character. He will be judged by the quality of his leadership and the success of his policies in staving off depression and putting America back on the path to prosperity.

Note: Yes, I wrote 'whet' your appetite. That's different from 'wet your whistle.'

Read about it here.

I don't know about you, but I've gotten some emails with an urgent time-sensitive plea to register my cell phone with a "DO NOT CALL" government site which blocks unwanted telemarketing phone calls.

Turns out, the information is mostly correct.

You can get the correct information here.

The Truth

The U.S. government has established a "do not call" registry where you can list phone numbers you want blocked from unsolicited calls such as from telemarketers.

That registry is for both wired and mobile phones and there is no deadline by which a phone number needs to be listed in order to be protected from telemarketing calls.
There is not a separate cell phone registry.

The registry is at: www.donotcall.gov.

At this writing there is discussion among mobile providers about setting up a mobile phone directory listing mobile phone numbers.

According to the Cellular Telephone and Internet Association (CTIA), a cell phone directory is proposed that would be available through calling directory assistance only, not published in writing or on the Internet.

So far, there is not a set date when that will be done and the CTIA says the numbers are not going to be "handed over" to telemarketers.

Users would have the option of not having their numbers listed in the directory.

Some telemarketers call some phone numbers regardless of whether they are listed in directories because they use devices that dial numbers in sequence looking for working numbers although at present, they are prohibited by law from including cell numbers.

The version that claims that the cell companies are being required by law to release the names by June 1, 2006, is also a hoax.

Thanks to a friend in Pittsburgh.

The State of the Church: Six Feet Under?

The Chatham Interfaith Clergy met at the rectory yesterday, for our annual Epiphany “Scones, Sherry and Proper Tea.” It’s always a great time. I am blessed with wonderful sisters and brothers in the faith we share in the One God of Abraham and Sarah.

Our Roman Catholic brother brought us a brochure that had just arrived at his parish. I’m sure my copy is in the office mail. I’ll read it more carefully later on today.

The brochure is from a local funeral home, informing the reader that it was now a ‘Full Service Funeral Home.’ Not only do they care for your loved one with ‘professionalism’ and your family with ‘compassion’, they also offer concierge service – someone who can help you with everything from a caterer for the funeral repast to hotel accommodations for out of town guests.

They can do a DVD of pictures of your loved one which can be shown during calling / viewing hours. They will then help you take all the ‘actual’ pictures and post them on tastefully done poster boards and position them around the parlor where your loved one lies in state.

Their website will post pictures of your loved one along with the obituary and any personal messages from the family. When you visit the webpage, you can choose from a selection of “condolence cards” which you can personalize and send to the family (no stamps, no running to the CVS to get a card – amazing, right?)

They also offer bereavement services with a licensed social worker, including bereavement support services.

But, wait! There’s more!

The funeral home now offers ‘specially trained’ (doesn’t say where) and ‘certified’ (doesn’t say by whom) . . . ready for this? . . . ‘celebrants’.

These ‘celebrants’ will work with the family of the bereaved to develop a ‘meaningful liturgy’ and ‘significant ritual’ with a ‘personalized eulogy’.

As you can imagine, a very interesting conversation followed. We began by speculating on those who might use this new service . It’s not hard to imagine that for those who are not connected to a church community, this new ‘service’ would be a godsend.

Or, for those who have difficulties with the current or interim pastor, or don’t have a regular pastor.

Or, perhaps for those whose loved one died a death due to alcohol, drugs or the cause of, say, a vehicular homicide.

We weren’t sure how we really felt about it, though. Is this a good thing, really? Should it be viewed as ‘competition’? Is it a sign of the further decline of the relevance of religion in our increasingly secularized culture?

Or, is it a sign that there is a deep hunger for spiritual nourishment which is simply not being met, much less fulfilled, by organized religion?

Is this an indication of the failure of the church to be relevant in the lives of people?

Or is it, rather, an unfortunate reality of the isolation of our consumer-oriented culture?

For many years, a person has not needed to ‘belong’ to a religious community in order to get married. There are Justices of the Peace and Mayors of Towns who do a lovely job. Wedding Chapels, complete with flowers and music have been in existence for years.

Confirmation and Bat Mitzvahs as a ‘rite of passage’ have been supplemented – and in some cases replaced – by elaborate Sweet Sixteen Parties – for boys and girls.

Why does anyone need to be a member of a church or a temple in order to have a ‘meaningful’ funeral service?

Why, you can simply purchase the service you need, when you need it, where you want it.

What’s next? Will ‘naming ceremonies’ replace baptism?

Well, sisters and brothers, how are we feeling about this? What do you think?

Is this a good thing or a bad innovation? Is this a threat or a benefit to organized religion? An indication of failure or irrelevance of organized religion or is it simply a sign of the times?

Is this just a way for funeral homes to keep their business successful at the local level and avoid being bought up by large, national chains?

Our Clergy Group is inviting the Funeral Home to come to our meeting next month to tell us more about this service. I’ll keep you posted.

I’m feeling pretty ambivalent about it, as a matter of fact. I guess I just need to process the information a bit more, which is why I’d love to hear what you have to say.

What Pets Write in Their Diary

It's silly, I know, but I just couldn't resist. It's amusingly accurate, at least from my experience. A wag of the tail to David C.

Excerpt from a Dog's Diary.....

8:00 am - Dog food! My favorite thing!

9:30 am - A car ride! My favorite thing!

9:40 am - A walk in the park! My favorite thing!

10:30 am - Got rubbed and petted! My favorite thing!

12:00 pm - Lunch! My favorite thing!

1:00 pm - Played in the yard! My favorite thing!

3:00 pm - Wagged my tail! My favorite thing!

5:00 pm - Milk Bones! My favorite thing!

7:00 pm - Got to play ball! My favorite thing!

8:00 pm - Wow! Watched TV with the people! My favorite thing!

11:00 pm - Sleeping on the bed! My favorite thing!

Excerpt from a Cat's Diary...


Day 983 of my captivity...

My captors continue to taunt me with bizarre little dangling objects. They dine lavishly on fresh meat, while the other inmates and I are fed hash or some sort of dry nuggets.

Although I make my contempt for the rations perfectly clear, I nevertheless must eat something in order to keep up my strength.

The only thing that keeps me going is my dream of escape. In an attempt to disgust them, I once again vomit on the carpet.

Today I decapitated a mouse and dropped its headless body at their feet. I had hoped this would strike fear into their hearts, since it clearly demonstrates what I am capable of. However, they merely made condescending comments about what a 'good little hunter' I am. Bastards.

There was some sort of assembly of their accomplices tonight. I was placed in solitary confinement for the duration of the event. However, I could hear the noises and smell the food. I overheard that my confinement was due to the power of 'allergies.' I must learn what this means and how to use it to my advantage.

Today I was almost successful in an attempt to assassinate one of my tormentors by weaving around his feet as he was walking. I must try this again tomorrow -- but at the top of the stairs.

I am convinced that the other prisoners here are flunkies and snitches. The dog receives special privileges. He is regularly released - and seems to be more than willing to return. He is obviously intellectually challenged.

The bird has got to be an informant. I observe him communicating with the guards regularly. I am certain that he reports my every move. My captors have arranged protective custody for him in an elevated cell, so he is safe. For now …

GOEs Part Tres: Back to School!

As I've been thinking about my "GOEs: Reality Bites" post, I realized that my note could be construed as either a whine or a fishing expedition for compliments. I meant it, of course, as neither. I apologize to any who understood it that way.

Just a tough day in the fast lane of parochial life and ministry, is all.

I also realized that those questions would be absolutely inappropriate for GOEs because most seminarians haven't been "prepared" for them. Most end up in an 8-10 hours a week placement of "field education", which is not enough time to wind your watch much less know what day it is in the parish. Neither do most seminaries provide a course in the "public practice of ministry."

With dwindling curacies and even fewer associate / assistant positions available, there are fewer and fewer opportunities for the newly ordained to learn the basics with / from a seasoned mentor.

The problem, I think, is not with the GOEs but with seminary education which, for the most part, does a wonderful job of preparing seminarians for priesthood, but in most cases I am aware of (and I speak from my own experience), doesn't even begin touch the realities of parish leadership.

If it did, then we'd see courses or mini courses like:

Small Business Finance 101

Basic Principles of Accounting

Buildings and Grounds 101
Part I: The Care and Feeding of Furnaces
Part II: Roof is Leaking!: How to tell if you need to patch or replace the Church roof
Part III: The Bathroom is Flooded!: How to unstop a clogged toilet without calling a plumber (or ruining your shoes or your manicure - or losing your lunch!).
Part IV: The REALLY Inclusive Church: Handicap Access 101
Part V: How to Negotiate with a Contractor, Plumber and/or Electrician
Part VI: How to develop a good building maintenance and repair program
Part VII: How to coordinate the use of your building and negotiate a reasonable and fair "fee for use" (long and short term) vs. "rent"

Capitol Fund Drive 101

Greek 501:
Part I: Understanding the language of the CDO Profile
Part II: Understanding the language and arithmetic of the Parochial Reports
Part III: Understanding the sacred mysteries of the Parish Register
Part IV: Understanding the Canons of the Church - especially Title IV

The Search Process
Part I: How to interview a parish calling committee
Part II: Beyond the Parish Profile: Interpreting the past five years of Parochial Reports.
Part III: Managing rejection

Xerox and Risograph Machines 101


Desktop Publishing 101


Surfing the Web without Drowning: Dreamweaver and other Web Page Designs

Meet The Press:
Part I: Soundbite Theology for Idiots (Not YOU. Them.)
Part II: Answering your own question while making them think you've answered theirs.

Parish Growth: Putting down spiritual roots before expanding branches

Hospitality 101:
Part I: You can't put it on at 7 AM and expect it to taste good at 11 AM: How to serve a decent cup of coffee at 'coffee hour'
Part II: The Attack of the Parish Greeting Team: How to say 'welcome' without seeming pathetic and desperate.

Creating Leaders without Burning Them Out

It Takes (LOTS of) Planning: Running an Effective Vestry or Committee Meeting


Hysteria and Chaos Management 101: The Bishop's Visitation, Christmas, Easter, Wedding, Baptism, and Funeral liturgical / music planning.

Forever Young
Part I: Children's Sermons: How to Survive Being Thrown into a Bucket of Live Bait
Part II: Acolyte Training: It's all fun until something goes wrong, and then it's hysterical
Part III: Youth Groups: Sunday Night Pizza Piety

Hurricanes, Fires, and Floods (Oh, my!): Natural disasters and the role of the church

Time Management in Chronos and Kyros 101

The Parent Trap:
Part I: Just because you call me 'Father' or 'Mother' doesn't make me one - or, yours.
Part II: How to cultivate a healthy relationship with your bishop.

Churches don't need a savior, they need a priest:
Part I: Family Systems Theory 101
Part II: Basic principles of Transference and Counter-transference

Hope for the Future:
Part I: Planning your sabbatical
Part II: Your pension and you
Part III: Retirement: It's never too early to plan (and it may keep you sane)

And, of course, my all time favorite:

On Being a Prophet in a Not-for-prophet Church
Part I: If you don't know where you're going, any road will take you there.
Part II: If you don't stand for something, you'll fall for anything.
Part III: The difference between Outreach/Inreach, Congregational Development and Mission: You don't have to be crazy to work here, but it helps
Part IV: "Birds of the air have nests . . .": How to negotiate a severance package

You know, the more I think about it, I'd LOVE to see the GOE questions on THESE courses!

Oh, the things we do for Jesus!

GOEs Part Deux: Reality Bites

One of the GOE readers wrote: "I can tell you we always pray they answer the questions that are actually asked!"

And I responded: I get that, but I gotta tell ya, as I've been "shooting arrow prayers" off and on all day for those taking GOEs, I've found myself reflecting on the important questions of parish ministry that never get taught, much less asked on GOEs.

Like what? You ask. Well, here are a few . . .

1. You have just had a breakfast meeting with a parishioner who originally "just wanted to catch up" which evolved into a conversation about the fact that her doctor just called and there is a lump in her breast and wants to schedule a biopsy. You walk from the diner to your office, grateful that you have arrived 30 minutes earlier than usual and have time to process what you just heard, only to discover a line of people waiting outside your door, which includes the UPS guy who wants you to sign for a package, an anxious Day Care teacher who wants you to know that the tile in one of the classrooms has lifted and must be replace before the state inspection next week and what are you going to do about that, and your 'favorite' parishioner who is waving last Sunday's bulletin in the air, saying loudly, "There are two typo's in this bulletin, and that is the third time this month alone. I'm going to decrease my pledge by $1 every time I find a typo." Your parish administrator is not due in for another hour. In a three page essay, discuss the meaning of Luke 23:34 and its implications for pastoral intervention in these situations.


2. The roof on the church and parish hall have been leaking for the past 4 years. You have finally convinced the Vestry of the need to have the roofs assessed. You have just reviewed all the information and find that the roofs need to be completely replaced at an estimated minimum cost of $100,000. What are the various ways of raising these needed funds and on what scriptural principles would you base your strategy (because you'll need to say something really profound in order to convince your finance committee to act in this financial climate.)? What ethical principles are indicated here? Cite applicable moral theology.


3. Your day includes a scheduled meeting with your Worship Committee to review the Advent/Christmas liturgy and music, a telephone interview with the local press to talk about your feelings about Rick Warren giving the invocation at the inauguration, trying to reach the webmaster (again) to update the web page after the holidays and before Lent begins, a meeting with the hospitality committee chair to coordinate the next month's events, a meeting with the co-chairs of the Altar Guild to discuss (again) why it is we don't re-consecrate the bread that was20left over from the 8 AM service at the 10 AM service, and yet another meeting with the Finance Committee to develop the third draft of the 2009 budget. One of your recent college graduates stops by and says, "I think, I mean . . .I've been thinking . . .I mean, I've been feeling that . . . Well (cough, stammer, looking down while shifting weight on feet) . .God may be calling me to ordination." In a three page essay, please answer: On what basis would you make your claim that priesthood is a meaningful vocation that can assist transformation in people's lives of faith? Please cite scripture and church history in your answer.

Yeah, it's been one of those days . . . .I just wrote all that without breaking a sweat!

There are some days when I remember that it took ten years to pay off my seminary loan debt and I laugh and shake my head. And then there are other days when . . .well. . .let's just say my response to that memory is less than gracious.

I suppose there's something to be said about that old adage, "Ignorance is bliss."

And, even on "one of those days" I know that I can do all of these things because, God help me (and S/he does!), the One who gave me "the will to do these things" has also given me "the grace and power to perform them."

I'm just glad I took the GOEs when I did. I think the more parish ministry experience you have, the less likely you are to pass them successfully - especially when limited to three page essays!!!!

Oh, the things we do for Jesus!

GOEs

Today marks the first day of the dreaded GOEs = General Ordination Exams.

Seminarians and those who are otherwise candidates (or, in rarer cases, who hope to be candidates) for ordination to the priesthood in The Episcopal Church are sitting for a week of exams.

The canons of the church (Title III, Canon 7, Section 5a) require that before ordination a candidate must be examined and show proficiency in:

1. The Holy Scriptures
2. Church History, including the Ecumenical Movement
3. Christian Theology, including Missionary Theology and Missiology
4. Christian Ethics and Moral Theology
5. Studies in Contemporary Society, including Racial and Minority Groups
6. Liturgics and Church Music
7. Theory and practice of Ministry

These exams are not designed simply to assess a seminarians knowledge in these areas. Seminary has, hopefully, already tested that. The GOEs are really designed to test whether or not a seminarian can integrate that knowledge.

For example, a question about Christian Ethics and Moral Theology may be asked about Holy Scripture.

The whole process is anonymous. That is, the writer has no idea who will be reading and evaluating her paper and the GOE readers will not know anything about the author. This is to insure that the paper is being read on its own merit, without bias.

The GOEs are then rated good (demonstrated proficiency in 6 or 7 areas), fair (demonstrated proficiency in 3, 4 or 5 areas), or poor (demonstrated proficiency in 0, 1 or 2 areas).

What happens then? Well, it really does depend on the candidate's bishop. It varies from diocese to diocese, with some remedial work required by most in areas of concern.

That being said, I've never known a bishop or a commission on ministry to deny ordination to someone who did not do well on GOEs. I'm not saying it has never happened. I'm just saying I've never heard of a situation where that occurred.

Delayed, yes. Denied, no.

So, what's the point?

Well, you know what? Beats the heck out of me.

Okay, so I suppose every profession needs to have a qualifying exam that sets the bar for a standard of knowledge and proficiency. That's the good part. The part that doesn't make sense - well, at least to my little pea brain - is how bishops and COMs treat the information.

Then again, I approach this whole subject with a hermeneutic of suspicion. The GOEs didn't come into existence until 1970. Until then, the 'old boy's network' worked just fine. Or, so I'm told.

When it became clear that the reality of the ordination of women was fast approaching the church, Voila! The General Board of Examining Chaplains came into being by order of General Convention 1970.

By 1972, they administered their first exam.

The 'Philadelphia Eleven' were ordained in July, 1974.

The Episcopal Church regularized their ordinations and allowed for the ordination of women to all orders of ministry in July, 1976, and the ordinations began in January, 1977. (You can check out the time line here.)

Coincidence? Oh, yeah, sure.

Well, good or bad, right or wrong, the GOEs are a fact of life - at least for this week. I know a few folk who are sitting for these exams this week.

Of your kindness and mercy, please keep them in your prayers.

The Epiphany

“. . . having been warned in a dream. . .” Matthew 2:1-12
The Sunday before Epiphany
January 4, 2009
The Episcopal Church of St. Paul, Chatham, NJ
(the Rev’d Dr.) Elizabeth Kaeton

It has been difficult to concentrate on this gospel, given all that has been happening this week in the very land where this gospel story takes place. It’s difficult to comprehend the fullness of the story.

I’m sure even the people on the ground in Jerusalem on Gaza have a hard time wrapping their heads around the truth.

Some of my friends who have been to Israel have come home decidedly pro-Palestinian and warn me all the time about the pro-Israeli biased of the US news reports. One of my friends, an Episcopal priest, wrote this note about her visit just two months ago,

“Over the past many months (the Israeli’s) have turned back all supplies of food, medicine, water, and humanitarian help. No one can get out or in (of Palestine) without Israeli permission. I stood at the Erez border crossing and watched bored Israeli soldiers refuse entry to humanitarian groups -- from Doctors without Borders to groups from France and the International Red Cross and even two cars of UN workers. Eventually they let a few through.

Although the group I was in (all four of us) had received permission from the Israeli government to enter Gaza, two of us were kept out. When asked the reason, the guard shrugged her shoulders and turned away. All of this while an Israeli soldier walked back and forth in front of us with his submachine gun ready to be used.”

One has to keep in mind, of course, that Hamas, known terrorists, are now the governing party in Palestine. So, to keep informed, I’ve read daily reports in Haaretz, the Israeli newspaper, and Al Jazeera, the Arab news service, along side the BBC news and compared them all to CNN and the US News reports.

They each sound as if they are talking about a The War ‘Someplace Else’. Meanwhile, thousands of Palestinian men, women, and especially children are being killed every day. The Israeli casualties pale in comparison.

Well, depending on which report you read. The Anglican Hospital in Gaza is only reporting that they are overwhelmed with casualties and fatalities.

There are no good guys in war. Only dead people.

Which begs the question, do the numbers of innocent people who die equal who is right and what is wrong? It is heartbreaking and terrifying and confusing and yes, confounding.

I fear that the soil in Jerusalem and Palestine is soaked with so much blood and has absorbed so much suffering and hatred that there will be no chance for anything to grow – new life, hope, peace, joy, love – in that land for generations.

This is all happening in a place we call ‘The Holy Land.’ This is all happening not far from the setting of today’s gospel story. Interesting . . . this gospel story ends on an ominous note: “And having been warned in a dream not to return to Herod, they left for their own country by another road.” The story continues with an angel appearing to Joseph in a dream, warning him that Herod is about to search for his son. Joseph bundles up Mary and Jesus and, following the directions of the angel, “departed to Egypt and remained there until the death of Herod.” (Mt. 2:13-15).

When Herod saw that he had been tricked by the wise men, he “flew into a furious rage and he sent and killed all the male children in Bethlehem and all in that region who were two years old or under . .” It’s the event known in our Christian calendar as the slaughter of the Holy Innocents, which we observed on the 29th of December. It seems that the more things change, especially in the Holy Land, the more they stay the same.

In his Christmas Eve Sermon at the Carol Service held at the Basilica of the Nativity in Bethlehem, Bishop Dawani, the Anglican Bishop in Jerusalem on Gaza, in the presence of Palestinian President Abbas and Prime Minister Salam Fayaad spoke of the Gift of Love “that gives us strength to respect the human dignity of all people, Christian, Muslim and Jews alike,” he said, “we are all created in the Image of God”.

The Bishop continued by saying, “The world waits in eager expectation for people of good will, courage and vision to set aside personal agendas, to encourage the change of heart, to empower all people of faith to tear down the walls of cruelty, fear and hatred. We cannot diminish or escape from the challenges before us which are very real and confront our people. Peace, a just durable peace, is rooted in the reconciling love of God for all the people of this land”.

The good bishop is, of course, right. Peace can only be obtained through understanding that we are all created in the image of God, and that we must – every Christian, Muslim and Jew alike – be committed to and work for the reconciling love of God who earnestly desires that we all become one.

But, I wonder . . . I wonder if this present situation, like the one so many thousands of years ago, isn’t in need of a wee bit of a miracle? I wonder if just a touch of ‘divine intervention’ isn’t in order?

I wonder if we don’t need to have simple men dreaming dreams of safety and security for their families? I wonder if we don’t need a few angels whispering in the ears of wise men who don’t do what the ruling powers expect of them.

I’m willing to bet that both Israelis and Palestinians alike are sick of living with the bloodshed and death and fear. I’m sure both Israeli and Palestinian people know that no wall that has divided a city has ever brought peace. I’m willing to bet that if you asked the people of Israel and Palestine what they would do to end the war and bring about peace, the first thing they would do is tear down that wall.

We are almost to the end of Christmastide. The 12 Days of Christmas end in just two days, on January 6th, the Feast of the Epiphany. It is the day we celebrate the manifestation of God to three wise men, who saw The Light of God in a newborn babe, wrapped in swaddling clothes and lying in a manger.

We will enter into the Epiphany Season, and our gospel stories will all be about the miraculous manifestations of God in Christ Jesus. We’ll hear them over and over again until the beginning of Lent.

So, I wonder as we wander around this newest outbreak of unholy war in the Holy Land, if there are any lessons, any in-breaking of the Light of wisdom and insight, we may learn from this gospel story.

Might it be that sometimes, the best way to avoid conflict is to walk away from it, as the wise men did? Or, perhaps one takes another route around it, and waits for things to settle down, the way Joseph did?

Scripture holds no easy answers – even though conflict was averted for the Holy Family, the King felt ‘tricked’ and set out to murder innocent babes and children anyway. Even so, we are, like St. Paul, “prisoners of hope”, people who live in the darkness of the shadow of war who have seen a Great Light.

We wait.

We hope.

We pray with the psalmist that God ‘will redeem their lives from oppression and violence and dear shall their blood be in his sight.’ Psalm 72:14)I wonder if, for that to happen, God’s holy people in that Holy Land, may need to be willing to see God in an entirely new way – not as a mighty warrior strong to save, but as vulnerability wrapped in poverty, as fragile as newborn hope, waiting to be picked up and held, comforted and cherished, loved more than life itself, and served beyond borders that divide us and over walls that defend the illusion that we are safe from each other.

May God’s Holy Light shine on and inspire all of God’s Holy people, now in this season of Light and forever.

Let there be peace on earth and good will to all of God’s people – and let it begin with me.

Amen.

A new logo for 2009

Hat tip to VT Crone.

I'm liking this a whole lot.

In Praise of Saturdays

When I was a kid, Saturday mornings for kids were almost as holy as Sunday morning for adults.

We watched cartoons. GREAT cartoons. Bugs Bunny. Road Runner and Wylie Coyote . Elmer Fudd. Tweety and Sylvester and Granny. Mickey Mouse. Donald Duck.

And then later, if the weather was bad, we might be able to watch Dick Clark's American Bandstand and Soul Train.

In between, for Catholic kids of a certain age, there were CCD (Confraternity of Christian Doctrine) classes, which usually began around 9 in the morning - a full two hours after the cartoons had begun. (I think there's another name for them now, but I can't remember the initials . . . RIC. . .C. . .A???? I have no doubt someone reading this will know and fill us in.).

The neat thing was that our Jewish friends were headed to Hebrew School at the same time, so streets and homes in the neighborhood of my youth were Very Quiet for a few hours every Saturday morning.

When we got home, there were chores to do: Help polish the silver or the furniture. Help wax the floors. Help gather and sort the laundry and hang it up to dry.

The emphasis was on 'help'. Our mothers were like patrol leaders who had memorized lists of Things To Do. We would be sent on one chore and, after reporting its completion and passing inspection, we would be sent on yet another chore.

We were like little puppies, sent out to fetch and return. And mostly, we did so without complaint. Well, if we did, we were certain to get the back of our mother's hand to cuff the top of our head.

Mothers also had Eyes In The Back of Their Heads. My mother could see the spot I had missed polishing the claw leg under the dinning room table from her spot in front of the kitchen sink.

I always thought there should be another Great Sorrowful Mystery, but I never had the nerve to request its addition from Father or Sister. How was it, exactly, that Mother could see that I had not fluffed the pillows on the living room couch by looking out the kitchen window?

Oh, woe was me, poor banished child of Eve!

After our chores were done and we had eaten our lunch (Fried baloney and grilled cheese sandwiches which we dunked in tomato soup - YUM!) it was off to ride bikes or play ball or hang out with your friends for the rest of the day.

Saturday nights were Bath Time (remember taking a WEEKLY bath???). It was also reserved for polishing shoes and making sure our white gloves were washed and ready for church in the morning.

Then it was The Lawrence Welk Show followed by The Ed Sullivan Show. Then, off to say our prayers before bed where we slept deep and dreamed of living, one day, in The Land of Big Rock Candy Mountain. Burl Ives sang it so we knew it must exist.

As an adult, Saturdays are now for one syllable words, all under the heading of a one syllable word:

CHORES:

Clean. Wash.

Hang. Dry.

Dust. Mop.

Wax. Polish.

Plan.

Pay Bills.

Move. Pack.

Drive. Gym.

LUNCH!!

Bank. Sale.

Store. Shop. Buy.

Cook. Bake.

Fry. Freeze.

WHEW!

This is not a complaint. There's actually something wonderful about all of these chores. There are so many places in my ministerial life that I start something and don't finish it, or, quite finish it, or, can't.

It requires enormous patience - not exactly my strongest suit.

So, doing chores, focusing on one-syllable words, has a certain satisfaction to it. I set out to do something, do it, and it gets done.

I can see it in the piles of folded laundry, in the way the furniture shines and the house smells good.

A satisfied smile crosses my face when I look into my freezer and see that it has soup for the coming week and the shelves are lined with pasta, canned vegetables, coffee and tea.

I can face another week of uncertainty - things done but mostly left undone or the effects of which I won't know for quite some time, if ever.

Come to think of it, it may just be that if you follow one-syllable words they may lead you to the path of satisfaction.

Love.

Warm.

Hug.

Sex (There, I said it.).

Work.

Eat.

Pray (Well, if you let go of getting an answer
on anything but God's time.)

Look.

See.

Hear.

There are probably many more but those are just off the top of my head. Please feel free to add your own.

I think Saturdays are meant for one-syllable words. They are designed for the simple, meaningless tasks of life that help to give the rest of your life meaning. They take you down a peg and humble you to celebrate the things that make you human.

And, in a strange way, they serve to remind you that you are, after all, a 'human being', not a 'human doing'.

Which is why, I suppose, Sundays follow Saturdays.

I just think that my Saturdays could be enhanced by an hour or so of good old fashioned cartoons.

I no longer need Burl Ive's Big Rock Candy Mountain, but you know, a fried baloney and grilled cheese sandwich with a hot mug of tomato soup sure sounds good, doesn't it?

2008 in Review: Uncle Jay explains it all

All is well: Thank you!

UPDATE: (See original post below). All is well. She had two "really big" seizures and was pretty disoriented afterward. She is now emotionally labile but she's doing okay. She'll even out in the next few hours.

The long term hope is that these EEGs will provide researchers the information needed to find a surgical intervention for this disorder so that she might be able to get off all medication.

Please don't get me wrong: We are so very, very grateful that there is medication available and that she is under such good control.

It's just that the medication has terrible, long-term side effects and has ominous implications for fertility and pregnancy. So, while we are thankful to be able to medically manage this disease, a cure would be nice. Real nice.

I simply can not tell you how grateful I am for all your prayers. Knowing you were lifting her (and us all) up in prayer really helped me to make it through the anxiety.

Pray now for John Travolta and Kelly Preston's 16 year old son Jett who apparently drowned or hit his head in the bath tub after having a seizure. It's every parent's worst nightmare.

Pray for all who have to live with this disease, for the doctors and medical professionals who tend to them, and for the researchers who are working diligently to find a cure.

Prayer request

One of our beautiful daughters has a seizure disorder which she developed in her freshman year in college. They called it "honeymoon seizure" because young girls who are prone to this often develop them between the ages of 18-21 and often after a stressful time - like, I suppose the wedding night.

Quaint image, right?

She has been stable for years, but once a year she goes in for an EEG. As part of the procedure, they stimulate a seizure so they can more completely assess her condition.

This is done once a year as a matter of course. Just a routine test. No big deal, really. Except, of course, that it is.

I'm leaving in a few moments to be with her and I'll stay with her until one of her friends comes in to spend the night. Just a precaution, is all.

Except that we'll all be anxious until it's all over.

So, if I may be so bold as to ask, I would deeply appreciate your sending some 'arrow prayers' this way.

You know. Just until it's all over. Which will be about 3:30 this afternoon.

Thank you. I feel better already, knowing that she will be lifted in prayer by such a mighty cloud of witnesses in the Communion of Saints.

UPDATE: All is well. She had two "really big" seizures and was pretty disoriented afterward. She is now emotionally labile but she's doing okay. She'll even out in the next few hours.

The long term hope is that these EEGs will provide researchers the information needed to find a surgical intervention for this disorder so that she might be able to get off all medication.

Please don't get me wrong: We are so very, very grateful that there is medication available and that she is under such good control.

It's just that the medication has terrible, long-term side effects and has ominous implications for fertility and pregnancy. So, while we are thankful to be able to medically manage this disease, a cure would be nice. Real nice.

I simply can not tell you how grateful I am for all your prayers. Knowing you were lifting her (and us all) up in prayer really helped me to make it through the anxiety.

Pray now for John Travolta and Kelly Preston's 16 year old son Jett who apparently drowned or hit his head in the bath tub after having a seizure. It's every parent's worst nightmare.

Pray for all who have to live with this disease, for the doctors and medical professionals who tend to them, and for the researchers who are working diligently to find a cure.

Women Bishops in England: Dave Walker Explains It All (As only Dave Walker Can)

ENGLAND: Women bishops draft legislation published;
measure to be debated at February synod
December 30, 2008

[Church of England] The General Synod will have its first opportunity to consider draft legislation enabling women to become bishops in the Church of England in February, having given an in-principle agreement to the shape of the legislative package last July. The Legislative Drafting Group on Women in the Episcopate, chaired by Bishop Nigel McCulloch of the Diocese of Manchester, on December 29 published its further report and drafts of a measure and associated amending canon.

"We have published our further report at the earliest opportunity to give everyone the chance to study it before debate. We finished our discussions only just before Christmas," said McCulloch. "The General Synod mandated us to draft a measure including special arrangements, within existing structures, for those unable to receive the ministry of women bishops and to do that in a national code of practice. We believe we have achieved that by providing for male complementary bishops, as we suggested in our earlier report, and now hand our work to the synod to discuss the drafts in detail."

The draft measure sets out legislation to accord with the mandate given by the General Synod last July that "special arrangements be available within the existing structures of the Church of England for those who as a matter of theological conviction will not be able to receive the ministry of women as bishops or priests" and that those arrangements "should be contained in a statutory national code of practice to which all concerned would be required to have regard." The draft measure provides for such arrangements, which include -- as foreshadowed in the illustrative draft Measure circulated in July -- provision for male "complementary bishops" to whom authority to provide episcopal ministry would be delegated by diocesan bishops.

A covering note to the drafting group's report from the House of Bishops acknowledges that the house would continue to have a special responsibility for seeking to help the Church of England, through the legislative process, come to a conclusion that built trust and that enabled as many people as possible to remain loyal Anglicans notwithstanding their differing theological convictions on this issue. Individual bishops would be able to lend their support to attempts to amend the draft legislation during the revision process.

The further report and drafts of a Measure and associated Amending Canon, together with an illustrative draft Code of Practice and an Explanatory Memorandum, can be read here.

Further details are available here.

In 2006, the synod passed a motion calling for the practical and legislative arrangements of admitting women to the episcopate to be explored and inviting dioceses, deaneries and parishes "to continue serious debate and reflection on the theological, practical, ecumenical and missiological aspects of the issue" of ordaining women bishops.

It is estimated that women bishops in England will not be canonically possible until at least 2014.

Marking and Making the Passage of Time - All on a Two Dog Night

Ms. Conroy and I stayed in last night. It was waaaayyyyy too cold to venture out - the windchill factor alone became the 'bonechill factor'.

It was at least a two dog night.

So, we went with "Plan B" - got some steamed lobsters and ate them all down at a single go, with TONS of drawn butter, of course. Then we had a yummy chocolate dessert followed by watching movies in the warmth and comfort of our own home.

Have you ever noticed how "Plan B" is often the best plan in the first place? Hey, maybe THAT's why it's called "Plan B". The "B" stands for "best."

Neither of us made it to watch the new - bigger, brighter - ball drop on Times Square. It's always seemed to me an odd way to mark the passage of time. Perhaps that's exactly its appeal and why millions of people from around the world gather there in the frigid cold to watch a ball drop on the New Year.

Some people mark time by making 'New Year's Resolution.' It's a way of expressing regret for things 'done and left undone' in the previous year and committing oneself to change for the better in the year to come.

I've started doing that in several aspects of my life.

I don't know how it happened, really, but the bathroom scale reports this morning that I've gained 12 pounds since just before Thanksgiving. So, you know what the first resolution is all about.

I've also determined to be a better steward of 'family time' - including my church family - as opposed to 'institutional church time.'

This year marks the end of my term as President of the Episcopal Women's Caucus. It will probably mark my last attendance at General Convention. I've been involved in National Church politics and church activism since the early 80's. I think it's time for the next generation to begin to take its place among the ranks of leadership.

Some of that depends on what happens in July and how General Convention looks and acts without three diocese there which had formerly refused to ordain women (San Joaquin, Fort Worth and Quincy), and one which had previously said that The Episcopal Church is apostate (Pittsburgh, of course).

Oh, it won't be all 'peaches and cream' with the absence those four bishops and the usual cast of characters that made up their deputations. We're still The Episcopal Church, with conservatives and progressives and everyone else in the middle.

The heart and soul of Anglicanism has never been about being right - we leave that to our Roman Catholic and Calvinist sisters and brothers. It's been about having an intense intellectual curiosity about the questions, and inviting our friends from Rome and Geneva to sit at the Canterbury table so we can all meet Jesus.

Besides, we still have those who consider themselves 'orthodox' who have decided to stay as the "loyal opposition", committed to changing this "embarrassment of a church" from the inside out to one that is more pure and holy (read: in their image).

They are but a very small fraction of the church as it is presently constituted. Small but loud. Very loud. They make loud, angry noises that scare some people into capitulation.

We'll have to wait and see how they effect the continuing conversation about the full inclusion of "all the baptized in all the sacraments of the church."

In the meantime, I've come to a conclusion that has become a resolution of sorts, I suppose. It's about "the orthodox" whom I, henceforth and furthermore, calling "the orthodites". They are NOT 'right' and they don't have it 'right' and they are not a branch of religion like "Orthodox Christians."

Okay, I suppose that's my first resolution for the New Year in Anglican Land.

The second is not to engage the orthodites in conversation. Well, not about anything having to do with The Episcopal Church or The Anglican Communion.

I did write to a brother orthodite on HOB/D just last night, after a painful conversation about marks of financial success or failure being an indicator of God's blessing on the particular discipleship and theology one was teaching one's flock.

For a few hours, I really thought we might be making some progress, but alas, it was not to be. Still very angry is he.

So, no more engagement in conversations with the orthodites. It's not healthy for them. It's not healthy for me. It's not healthy for the church.

What's that saying attributed to Mark Twain? Oh yes, "Never try to teach a pig to sing. You'll only get frustrated and it will annoy the pig." Right.

I had, just that morning, written privately to Greg Griffiths over in Viagraland, asking him to please remove my "membership" - which, essentially, simply surrenders the "privilege" of posting comments there. My note was a simple request - no reasons, no editorials, no shame, no blame. Just, "Take me off your membership, sir, please and thank you."

Guess what? Now, whenever I sign on over at Viagraland, I get a little notice that "the server is down." That's a lie, of course. They are still up and running.

Greg, bless him from the bottoms of his little pink feet to the top of his pointy little head, is behaving in the predictable pattern of an abuser. I've dared to stop engaging, so he's changed the locks on the door.

Funny, when it isn't pathetic. I can still get over there whenever I want to. I'm not as dumb as Greg thinks I am. The thing of it is, I don't want to. I don't really care anymore.

I realized that when it finally came to me that more than half of the people who comment there are no longer members of The Episcopal Church.

Indeed, some of the board members are no longer Episcopalians, and the others are unrepentant orthodites. So, I've asked myself, "Self? Why do you care what they think?" And myself said, "Right. I don't."

And since I've started a New Year's Policy of Disengagement, well, I'm free.

It's a good feeling. Nah, actually, it's a GREAT feeling.

It's not just about the orthodites although I have given them more of my time than they deserve. I'm ashamed, now, to admit that, but well, there it is.

No, it's really more about the institutional church. She is, I have learned over the past 40 years, a very difficult lover. Mercurial, at times, She can wrap her arms around you one day and betray you the next, all in the name of Jesus.

Here's the thing: in four months, I will be celebrating a significant birthday. The Big Six-O. I'm really excited about that. I've never felt better in my life (well, okay, I'll feel even better after I lose 1-15 pounds and get back into the gym on a regular basis). I have more energy for the people and things I love than I've ever had in my life.

I feel more confident about my skills and abilities. I know what I can do and what I do well. I also know what I can't do and what I can learn to do better, and what I just need to let go of.

I think it's the letting go of the old baggage that is giving me more energy. It's amazing how that works.

I am looking forward to starting 2009 with a building project that will put a new roof on the church, install an elevator and make the bathrooms handicap accessible. I'm hoping to end 2009 with a great sabbatical, coming back refreshed and renewed, and continuing to work hard on building up community and relationship and strengthening ourselves for mission and ministry.

Here's my final resolution: I'm going to stop 'marking' the passage of time and 'making' the passage of time.

By that I mean I am going to be more of a participant and less an observer in life. Okay, well, I haven't exactly been sitting on the sidelines all these years, but I'm thinking I've still got a great deal to do in the next 20 years or so.

It's time to get on with it.

It's time to make and not just mark the passage of time.

Because, what I've learned is that the old saying is true:

Today is - these days are - the good old days.

If you drop by for a visit, tell us some of your 'resolutions'. I'd love to hear what you plan to do with your time.

Happy New Year, everyone!

May peace and prosperity be welcomed guests and lengthy visitors.