It started innocently enough. Then again, things like this tend to do that.
Over at Barkings of An Old Dog, +Clumber (the wonder dog) has a real talent in his ability to confront with piercing humor the insanity and evil which often lurk at the edges of 'orthodite' theology.
So, when a certain 'orthodite' priest from Binghamton, NY wrote these words . . . . . .
And the answer is the same…because whether we are Anglican or not, the body of Christ is vital to our lives. You see classic Christianity as a threat to your warped and novel view of Anglicanism (and it is). I see revisionism as a tick on the body of Christ (and it is). So here we are. We will be opposed to one another until the truth wins out…as it will.
. . . . . I knew it would only be a very short matter of time before +Clumber, that old wonder dog, would start barking. He isn't the first Canine Bishop in the Anglican Communion for nothing, you know.
I also knew that it would be funny.
And, so it is.
+Clumber has now started a series he barks as - ready? -
It's brilliant, really. The only way to deal with this kind of insanity and evil is to laugh at it. It won't make it go away, but like confronting bullies on the playground, it will silence them for a while. Sometimes, not long enough, but enough to make it worth the effort - and, have fun laughing at ourselves in the process.
Here's the Roman Catholic Tick in the Wall.
FranIAm commits heresy every time she adds kidney beans to her chili.
Yes, she does. She also thinks a bowl of chili can change your life.
It's all part of her plot to subvert the dominant paradigm. She's now infiltrated the inner core, working as a lowly 'Parish Secretary' by day.
But, by night, we know her as the Blogger Who Will One Day Rule The World.
Except, she'll do it with the subversive trick of unconditional love. You know, just the way Jesus intended. Only, she'll have her dog Gracie by her side.
Here's the Grandmere Mimi-Tick. And, here's a sample of just how dangerous she can be, an example of the praxis of her evil revisionist theology:
"It’s sad that a few spoilers choose to disrupt the blogosphere in this manner, but those of you who engage in this sort of mischief should keep in mind that, although I am an old lady, I am not necessarily an easy mark. I have the makings of a dictator in me. Wounded Bird is my home online, and you must pay me the courtesy of acting here as you would if you visited me in my home."
And, of course, this would be the Evil Lesbian Priestess Tick - the most persistent of them all.
Here's a sample of her dangerous, evil revisionist theology, taken directly from the last sermon posted on her very own blog:
"And, soul by soul, heart by heart, pew by pew, church by church, inch by inch, we will reclaim the world in the name of Jesus, who had absolutely no authority at all."
See what I mean?
These are but three of the many 'Ticks in the Wall' which +Clumber has exposed. Go over and see the entire gallery. You won't be disappointed and you'll recognize many of your revisionist friends.
Who knew we were such a danger to the Body of Christ, leaching off it with our dangerous theology of the radical hospitality and inclusive love of Jesus?
Here's the thing: this poor 'orthodite priest' just let his real agenda slip out. I may not be a systematic theologian or a exegetical genius, but I’m smart enough to have figured this one out.
We have seen this dynamic over and over in the history of the world. Step one is to de-humanize or objectify 'the enemy'. It was the "Vermin Jews" in Germany. The Tutsi "Cockroaches" in Rwanda.
No American soldier every shot an innocent person in war. They were just "Crouts" or "Gooks" or "Towel Heads" - or children of those "things".
No real woman ever got raped. She was 'asking for it' because she was a 'slut' or a 'ho' and anyway, you could tell because she was wearing tight pants or a short skirt.
And, now Sisters and Brothers in Christ, there are "Ticks on the Body of Christ" in the new, non-geographical orthodite province which professes to be 'classical' Anglicanism.
Sort of like 'Coke classic'. We remember how long THAT lasted.
This comes as no surprise. The ‘orthodites’ have been very clear in their desire to exterminate so-called ‘revisionists’ in general and LGBT people in particular from the membership roles of Christianity.
Poor baby. He has no idea that the 'dark rotten mess for a heart and guts' of his uber-Calvinist tendencies are showing. Or, perhaps they are tendencies of a different sort.
What was it Mr. William Shakespeare said? Ah, yes: “I fear the man doth protest too much.”
All in all, it's just another tick in the wall.