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Saturday, July 30, 2022

Success and accomplishment

 


Sometimes 'success' looks different to different people. So does 'accomplishment'. For me, accomplishment nearly always looks like success.

What am I talking about?
Well, see that large black bag there on the right? You probably see a garbage bag, right? That actually represents about 90 minutes of work, thinning out my closet and four sets of drawers of clothes that I've not worn in a long while and either no longer fit me or are no longer part of my style. They are all in perfect condition - all washed and folded (that was another chore) - and off they'll go to the Thrift Store on Monday.

The other two are of laundry - sweaters that were a bit stained so they got the SHOUT treatment before laundering and are now beautiful - and regular weekly laundry that needs to line dry rather than in the dryer.

Looks mundane and common - too much so to be called an accomplishment much less success. I admit it; you're not completely wrong. There are people around the world who have already accomplished three, maybe four times the work these chores represent, six times before breakfast. And, they don't even have 1/8 of a bag of clothes to their name, much less to give away.


But, you know what? I'm not them and they are not me. I am me and I was able to "make time" and get this stuff done this morning. Which, for me, is huge. There is actually something I've done with my morning (okay, besides making some ah-mazing coffee and am about to start a great breakfast) that I can look at and say, "Hey, look. I did that."

There aren't too many things in the life of a priest in ministry where one can actually point to something concrete and tangible and feel a sense of accomplishment and success.

Hear me: I'm not complaining. On the contrary, I am blessed to be able to do what I do. Hospice ministry is really my jam. When I come across a nurse's report of a patient who has died and she has written, "patient died peacefully, surrounded by his family," I feel enormous joy and a sense of accomplishment and success.

That's especially so when I remember some of the conversations and struggles we've had to work through together - that patient and his family and me - to find that peace. That may not seem like much to some but it means the world to me. I just can't bring it home and say, "Hey, look. I helped to do that."

Not that I need to. It's just that it would be nice, once in a while. It is pretty wonderful when one of my team members - a nurse, social worker, and/or CNA - sees me out somewhere and we talk about that patient and someone puts their hand on my shoulder and says, "We did some good work there, didn't we?" And, I feel such deep joy that it brings tears to my eyes.

Parish ministry? Well, accomplishment and success there are a bit more elusive. It's easy to often feel like a failure or at least, not up to snuff; at worse, an imposter.

These days, one has to be an expert in so many things that were not even discussed in seminary:

Finance - how to read and understand a simple P&L Balance sheet. How to spot upward and downward trends. How to inspire to use money as a means, not as an end; how to teach that a budget is a statement of priority as well as theology.

Fundraising (AKA "Stewardship") - how to tailor all the fancy-pants, slick programs out there for a struggling, small, decimated congregation.

HR/Personnel - how to write a Job Description and/or develop a Letter of Agreement, and conflict management between staff and/or parishioners. How to diagnose low-level bickering and pettiness and gossip so that they can be appropriately and more effectively addressed.

Buildings and Grounds - how to negotiate with a contractor or shop for the best locksmith or know a fair price for the services of a plumber or electrician or shop for a boiler or heating or air conditioning system.

Education/Christian Formation - how to organize and present engaging programs that edify and raise awareness while deepening faith that targets the spiritual development needs of specific age groups (See Fowler's Stages of Development).

Preaching and Liturgy - how to write and deliver sermons that are relevant and send people home inspired to put the Gospel message into some form of action in their lives. How to inspire faith on Sunday through the liturgical calendar and music and art that lasts at least until Thursday. How to use the liturgy as a pedagogical tool.

Infrastructure - how to rebuild it after it has been decimated by 3-5 years of scarce, inconsistent, or non-existed trained, skilled leadership of the laity or ordained, but which is particularly devastating when coupled with the lack of sacramental and pedagogical ministry of the ordained which edifies the Body of Christ.

And, not last and certainly not least: How to raise consciousness and action regarding Gospel Justice - especially when it presents itself in a local issue - and especially without scolding or shaming and finding a way to 'yes' while still helping people save face.

And, and, and, and, AND . . . how to do all that without support, without feeling like you're part of a team, like the Lone Ranger wearing the mask of an imposter, but without either Tonto or a silver bullet.

See what I mean? Yeah, I'm just going to leave all that there. Maybe I'll come back to it when I write that book. Maybe that will make me feel less of a complete and utter failure.

So, every now and again this weekend, I'm just going to pass by my big black garbage bag and laundry lines of accomplishment and success. And, smile.

It should also take my mind off the shenanigans across The Pond at the Lambeth Conference, with those who are so eager to "go along to get along" that they forget the cautionary words of James Baldwin:
"We can disagree and still love each other unless your disagreement is rooted in my oppression and denial of my humanity and right to exist."
Or, as Becca Ehrlich recently tweeted:
"Organizational decay: when the nature of an organization shifts from doing work in the real world to presenting a dramatization of its own perfection in a fantasy world. (Narcissistic Process and Corporate Decay by Howard Schwartz)."
Off I go then. Tying up loose ends of the morning so I can go off and see "Where the Crawdad Sing." Loved the book. Can't wait to see the film. I hear it's magnificent.

Have a wonderful Saturday. Hope you are able to find a sense of accomplishment and success. It can happen if you look in unexpected places.

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