Come in! Come in!

"If you are a dreamer, come in. If you are a dreamer, a wisher, a liar, a Hope-er, a Pray-er, a Magic Bean buyer; if you're a pretender, come sit by my fire. For we have some flax-golden tales to spin. Come in! Come in!" -- Shel Silverstein

Monday, January 13, 2025

Epiphany VII: Resources

 

Good Monday morning, good citizens of The Epiphany Season. I have two resources I wanted to make sure to share with you, in case you need them for yourself or someone in your life.

I think they are revelations, "showings," manifestations of God's light in a particular time of darkness.

There are lots of good resources for understanding and living with Breast Cancer which is so important on so many levels, not the least of which is that cancer threatens your life even while it is taking from you or disfiguring a part of your body that defines you, at least externally, as a woman.

The first is "Dr. Susan Love's Breast Book." by Susan M. Love, MD. The NY Times calls it "A de facto bible for breast cancer patients". That has been my exact experience. (PS The latest is the 7th edition.)

Now, I must say that my hospital and the Cancer Center have been excellent in terms of providing written resources. They teach, teach, teach, all the time, which empowers their patients and families. I have a binder **this thick** with resources and information from them which has been very helpful.

And, nothing can touch Dr. Love's Breast Book. It has a "voice," you know? It's not just a sterile, medical manual or a flat, one-dimensional, bullet-point, illustrated "resource sheet". You get the distinct sense that behind every word is a very skilled, highly experienced doctor who wants to ensure you have all the information you need to actively participate in your health care.

One of the nurses at The Breast Center told me that "informed patients are a joy to work with. You not only make our work so much easier, you make it more rewarding." I told her about Dr. Love's book and she couldn't have agreed more.

Dr. Love died of recurrent leukemia in 2003 but she leaves not only this book but the National Breast Cancer Coalition which provides ongoing, invaluable research and resources to women (and men and transpeople) with breast cancer.

If someone you know or love is diagnosed with breast cancer and you want to "do something to help" ask if they have this book. If they don't buy it for them. It's a bit intimidating, so when you give it to them remind them it's not a "novel". You don't sit down one evening in front of the fire to be entertained by it.

It's a godsend for de-mystifying a horrible, frightening process for breast cancer patients and those who love them. Dr. Love's "voice" is clear, sensible, kind, and thoughtful, with an occasional appearance of a very gentle sense of humor. All of those qualities are necessary when you're faced with cancer. This book will help.

The second book is "The Desert Shall Rejoice: Psalms from the Wilderness of Breast Cancer" by Susan E. Goff. Susan Goff is a visual artist, writer, and PS&OBTW, in 2012, became the first woman elected bishop in The Episcopal Diocese of Virginia.

What Bishop Goff has done is chronicle her journey through Breast Cancer with Psalms, tracing the events from the initial screening mammogram, through her treatment, and onto her "cancerversary." As the blurb on the book jacket says, "The Psalms reflect a journey filled with sorrow, laughter, and (mostly) unshakable hope."

I have given a copy of this book to my surgeon, my radiation oncologist, and my medical oncologist. I've also sent a copy to a dear friend - a sister of my heart - who is fighting another form of cancer. Although this is a book about a woman's journey through breast cancer, this is more about the spiritual battle of a very frightening disease than it is about the specific form of it.

Here's a sample:

Psalm Against
“At Least”
Susan E. Goff

O God, when they start a sentence with “At least,”
please silence their tongues.
When they want to encourage me with “At least,”
please mute their voices.
At least they caught it early.
At least the tumor is small.
At least they don’t do radical mastectomies anymore.
At least you are healthy and strong.
At least you’re still young.
At least you’ve got good insurance.
At least you know that God is with you.
At least you’ll only have four infusions.
At least you’ll only have sixteen radiation treatments.
At least.
At least.
At least.

I don’t want at least.
I don’t want any of the least of these.
I don’t want the pittance
the leftovers
the lowest
the minimum.
I want the most of life
and healing
and grace
and love.
I claim the most of all that you intend, O God.
Life abundant. Even here. Even now.

So when they begin their consolation with “At least,”
let me smile kindly,
trust that they intend more,
and claim the most.

If someone you know or love is diagnosed with breast cancer and you want to "do something to help" ask if they have this book. If they don't, buy it for them.

Bishop Susan's voice, like the voice of many ancient psalmists, is one of searing honesty, generous and startling candor, humor - sometimes "gallows" other times irreverent, wisdom that has been born of pain and suffering, prophetic challenge, compassion for herself and others, and, mostly, love. She's also not afraid to drop an "F-bomb" when that's appropriate.

There are many, many other resources for those who are on The Breast Cancer Camino. These are two I have come to cherish. One provides solid, necessary information; the other provides bedrock spirituality and a way to pray, especially when words seem inadequate or impossible to find.

I hope something good happens to you today.

Bom dia.

No comments: